Leaving You Soon

It is the first day of my 12th semester which is my final semester in medical school, inshaAllah.

It has been a long journey and it seems to end soon... This feels so surreal..

This morning I sat for Therapy exam.. the feeling was kinda weird this time.

Everything was like so subtle.. and a little bit severe palpitation..

I was a lot better than last semester.. better at calming down myself..

The exam was okay.. but when I was answering the question, I had higher expectation.

Because I can answer all the questions on the question ticket.. except for the practical part,

the ECG and local Xray of the hand.. I was a bit reluctant. But the luck was roughly with me.

I tried so hard to accept it this time.. usually, I can cool myself down with 

"I tried my best.. I gave my all". However this time, even with "Allah has written this for me"

couldn't ease my uneasiness. Perhaps because it is my very last semester.. I wish I could have done better because there's no more 'next' for the time being.. 

& I don't even plan to be a student in 3-4 years time 😆

Somehow it was not the reason I decided to write tonight.

The vibe is kinda strange this night..

I walked along the Ulitsa Mira.. where the Moliere Cafe, Massimo Cafe and the Black Star Burger..

I shoud take some pictures there next time...

It is my favorite road here in Volgograd.. it's a little bit sentimental to me..

& there is also the sign of 'Волгоград' which means 'Volgograd' itself.....

I am leaving this city in 48 days... I feel very, very sad...

The life will be so far different from now.. no more random plans to eat, no more stopping by at the mall or the beauty shop or supermarket or anywhere... no more night strolling till midnight..

there is so many 'no more'.. and the most important is.. no more cold weather hahaha.

Volgograd has a special place in my heart.. yes I know I have been through a lot.. 

but this place has been watching me growing up, in pain but also appreciating my freedom.

This night... has been.. a little bit teary... trying to accept that every hello will have its goodbye.

I guess I wont return here anymore, & I dont want to expect any possibilities for me to come here again.. but I hope, this sadness wont remain long.. because I feel so empty inside..

I just want to enjoy my time at its best here...

And oh yeah.. snow.. please visit me often within this 48 days....